I’m a huge fan of being scared, I really am. It started at a very young age, technically before I was “an age”. My mother, “the horror buff”, took me, her 7 month old infant to see “A Nightmare on Elm Street”. I was a good baby, didn’t cry a lot and she took the risk. I acted as she expected and sat there watching the entire flick with fierce intensity in my lil hazel eyes….or so the story goes. Who knows, really, but that started a love affair with a genre that has…well…kind of disappointed me in the long run.
I haven’t been scared by a movie in a really long time. I haven’t been genuinely, truly, honestly SCARED since about the 4th “Nightmare on Elm Street” when Freddy Krueger popped out of a waterbed. In my defense, I had just convinced my parents that I needed a waterbed to exist, god damn I was a conniving little four-year-old, but still, I was genuinely scared to the point I could not sleep at night…and then hit a twenty-three year dry spell. Until last night. (Full Disclosure here: I was a tiny bit scared when I watched Private Valentine, but that is the closest I’ve come, no joke, I fell asleep during “Seven”. Worked in a haunted house for 9 years. It’s a fucking feat to scare me. But god damn it, do I have one helluva “horror chick scream”!)
Between the religious nut jobs, the government that has unlimited power since 9/11 and the good Catholic girl in the back of my mind that says that every single thing in the Bible is accurate no matter what the bitchy redheaded Atheist chick upfront says…this movie scared the fuck out of me. Could not sleep worth a shit scared.
I’m a huge Kevin Smith fan, I mean, one of his movies is not only on my Top 5 list, but was the catalyst for the damn list in the first place, so I’m not completely impartial here, but just because I like the guy’s dialogue does not inherently mean I wasn’t a bit concerned that his jaunt into horror would, could, maybe, perhaps, leave me as disappointed as I have been sitting down to watch every other horror flick I have sat down to watch for the past two decades or so…the concern was misguided.
most all of my other reviews, this has simply turned out to be a rambling mess in which I tell you very little about the actual flick, but maybe, just maybe, that’s because I just don’t want to spoil a thing for you. This movie was worth all of the wait, and now that it’s on Netflix, you have no reason not to watch it.